So, the first thing I wrote on the top of my page the other day when I was thinking about today and you is, don't move. And then I waited for a while. A long time ago there was a young man who sat down under a tree and he spent the entire day in meditation, just like us. And we don't know, we don't think he had much of a plan, you know, maybe 40 minute periods and 10 minutes of walking. You really don't know.

[01:04]

But we do know that he had tremendous determination. This is from the Pali Suttas, turning his back upon the trunk of the Bodhi tree and with his face toward the east, he made the firm resolve, may skin and deed and sinews and bones wilt away, may flesh and blood in my body dry up. But until I attain to complete enlightenment, this seat I will not leave. And he sat himself down in a cross-legged position, firm and immovable, as if welded with a hundred thunderbolts. So this decision that he made not to move is the inspiration for what we are doing, or maybe not doing, today. And I think we all have some kind of feeling for what it means not to move.

[02:11]

You know, we use words in our language like solid as a rock, stiff as a board, dead as a doornail. But fortunately the Buddha had something else in mind when he said, don't move. And that something is to be right where you are, completely who you are, leaving absolutely nothing out, nothing outside of yourself, your big, big self. And the image that came to me when I was kind of trying to be my big self was an experience

[03:13]

I had at the opera, sitting very close to the front row. I'd never been to the opera, and a friend invited me to go, and we sat very close to the stage. And what struck me most from that experience was, from the moment the curtain went up, the utter stillness of the people around me. Nobody coughed, wiggled, or whispered. They just looked and listened and felt a tremendous amount. I could tell, because every once in a while all of us were crying. The story was so sad. Everyone good in it was fated to die. So it's pretty impressive, the level of practice at the San Francisco Opera House.

[04:18]

I was really tested. Hours went by. So the young Buddha-to-be, likewise, was sorely tested under his tree, hour by hour, day by day. And little demons and dancing nymphs came to knock him off his seat. I think these are pretty familiar little beings to us. They have names. Their names are things like Sensual Desire, Discontent, Delight, Boredom, Cowardice, Doubt. But he allowed no such feelings as arose in him to gain power over his mind. This refrain appears over and over again in the account of the Buddha's awakening.

[05:26]

With each new insight, each new level of understanding, he says to himself, I allow no such feelings as arise in me to gain power over my mind. So I wanted to suggest to you that today this might be something you could adopt for yourself, for your practice, this phrase. And whether you're being drawn into very pleasant varieties of experience or very unpleasant varieties, see if you can remember what the Buddha did as his core practice. Allowing no such feelings as arise in me to gain power over my mind.

[06:30]

So after seven days in the light of a morning star, this young man declared, it is liberated. Birth is exhausted. The holy life has been lived out. What was to be done is done. There is no more of this to come. I and all beings on earth together attain enlightenment at the same time. Ignorance is banished and true knowledge arisen. Darkness is banished and light arisen. As happens in one who is diligent, ardent and self-controlled. But I allow no such pleasant feeling as arises in me to gain power over my mind. That's what it says following his awakening. Even then.

[07:39]

Even then. So after this wonderful morning, the Buddha did something that I'm not sure many of you know. I've always, people seem surprised when I tell them what he did. He spent 49 days enjoying himself. First, he spent another seven days under the Bodhi tree, reviewing what he'd learned, dependent co-arising, Four Noble Truths. He went over and over in his mind, forward and backward, both forward and backward, what he came to understand. So I wanted to tell you the basic formula of what he was studying. He was studying causation, how things come to be. And the formula is very simple, like a lot of formulas, you know, E equals MC squared.

[08:45]

It's very easy to say, but what does it mean? How do you understand? So the formula of causation is very simple too. It goes like this. When ignorance and desire are present, suffering comes to be. When ignorance and desire are present, suffering comes to be. When ignorance and desire cease, suffering ceases to be. That's it. Very easy to say, and not so easy to do. And even the Buddha spent a week thinking about it again. So, after he spent this seven days under the Bodhi tree, he then moved to a goat herd's banyan tree and spent another seven days.

[09:47]

And then another seven days under a mucalinda tree, which I don't know what that is, I was going to ask Wendy if she knew, mucalinda tree, and then back to a banyan tree again. And so he kind of made his way around the forest. Now if the story ended there, I propose that we would not be sitting here today talking about the Buddha and his realization. If the story ended with his jijūyū-samāyī, self-fulfilling realization, self-fulfilling samādhi, jijūyū-samāyī, personal liberation, because we wouldn't know anything about him, he would have kept it to himself. I know you've all heard that kind of silly question, if a tree falls in the forest and

[10:53]

no one's there to hear it, does it make a sound? Well, maybe it does or maybe it doesn't, but who cares? You know, our practice is about intimacy, about experiencing the truth all the way into the marrow of your bones, seeing for yourself, knowing for yourself. So it really isn't the Buddha Dharma until it's shared with others. And the Buddha knew precisely how difficult it was to understand his mind and the manifestations that appeared in his mind, and he was very reluctant to teach. He didn't think people would understand. So he remained silent, and this is what he said. How could liberation, which is so exquisite and profound, be expressed in words?

[11:58]

It may be better not to give out my thoughts, he said to himself, and so remained silent and at peace. But lucky for us, he had second thoughts. And he remembered that he'd made a vow when he was a young bodhisattva that he would help other people. He made that vow, and he remembered his vow and thought, well, maybe I should try to explain. And when he had that thought, the Lord of the Gods, Brahma, came down and said, please teach, please explain to people for the sake of the suffering world. So I think it's really important for us to keep in mind throughout our whole life of practice these two very important key elements, and one is our vow, our promise, our word,

[12:59]

and the other is caring for others. And the basic vow is the vow to care for others, equally with ourselves. So even though the entire teaching is expressed through wisdom, the point of the teaching is entirely compassion. And each of us needs to find and nurture in our own hearts that deep desire to care for others as we would for ourselves, because the Buddhist world is a world where there is no second person. There is only great big self. This is tājūyū-samādhi, tājūyū-samādhi, the joyful samādhi that is shared with others.

[14:08]

So only when this young teacher came out of the forest in search of those who might understand did the Buddha's way appear in the world. So part two of what I want to say this morning has to do with, well, what did he teach? What did he have to say? And he really just taught two things. The first thing he taught was how, how. How to sit with your head balanced on your spine. How to hold your hands in a nice oval shape. How to use your legs for sitting and walking. How to use your bowls for eating. How to use your mind for calm and clear thinking.

[15:12]

It's a very simple, basic stuff. And we call this stuff practice. He taught how to practice. Other names are the way or the path. The way or the path to what? He also taught what? Realization. Liberation. How and what? The path of realization. I think some of you know that I've been spending a lot of time sewing lately. And at first it was kind of a chore. You know, I thought, I was afraid to calculate how many miles I had to go. But it was something like that. And it seemed like so much to do in so little time.

[16:20]

You know, even though it was over ten years. But most of those ten years I was doing the other kind of sewing we do here, which is not sewing. So my time is up. And what's happened is interesting and wonderful to me because hour after hour and day after day of placing the needle into the cloth, I have really come to love those little dots that mark the rows up and down, up and down, one after the other. They look like little seeds in soil. And I don't know what's going to grow from them. I haven't the faintest idea. It's mysterious to me. You know, what is the business under the row? All I can see are these little details, one after the other.

[17:27]

And once in a while I get a kind of feeling for something that looks like completion. Oh my goodness, I'm almost done. And then I start to wonder, well, done with what? Done with a row? Done with a robe? Done with the ritual? With this talk? With the next inhalation or the next exhalation? I allow no such feeling as arises in me to gain power over my mind. So this is the other thing that the Buddha taught, is liberation, an inconceivable liberation. And I wanted to read you a small sample from the Vimalakirti Sutra. For the Tathagatas and the Bodhisattvas,

[18:34]

there is a liberation called inconceivable. The Bodhisattva who lives in the inconceivable liberation can pour into a single pore of her skin all the waters of the four great oceans, without injuring the water animals such as fish, tortoises, crocodiles, frogs and other creatures, and without the Nagas, Yakshas, Gandharvas and Asuras even being aware of where they are, and the whole operation is visible, without injury or disturbance to any of those living beings. Such a Bodhisattva can pick up with her right hand this billion-world galactic universe as if it were a potter's wheel, and spinning it around, throw it beyond universes as numerous as the sands of the Ganges, without the living beings therein knowing their motion or its origin.

[19:36]

And she can catch it and put it back in its place, without the living beings suspecting their coming and going, and yet the whole operation is visible. You know, so when we read about this kind of liberation, it really seems like it might be a lot of fun, you know? And in fact it is fun when we read it. Our minds enter into the words, become the words. Off we go. Without pain or confusion the waters of the four great oceans pour into my body through a tiny opening. You know, it's no problem. I can do that. You can do that. Mind is a wonderful thing. But the problem isn't how wonderful the mind is. The problem is that it's not limited to things we enjoy.

[20:37]

What about when people we love begin to die? Or when children with rifles begin to shoot one another as though it were a game? Sometimes the miracle is unbearable. So each day of our life is filled with all kinds of things, good things and bad things, sad and happy, light and dark, birth and death. Two by two. So the reason that we practice not moving, immobile sitting, isn't to get to some kind of wonderful place, some eternal bliss from which we will never have to return. We practice so that we can bear,

[21:42]

that we can be strong and calm, so that we can face what's going on in this world where we live. Unless our minds are calm, it's really difficult for us when miracles happen, when magical things come into our eyes and into our ears. A calm mind sees everything, both inside and out, dogs, cats, fish, mountains and rivers, without being bound by them or liberated by them. So we don't ignore what's happening and we don't desire what's happening. Let it be anything different than exactly what it is.

[22:45]

When ignorance and desire are present, suffering comes to be. With the cessation of ignorance and desire, suffering ceases to be. Suzuki Roshi said that if you are determined to sit, you should not try to find some easy way. The only way is to sit right where you are and to find the complete, absolute composure right where you sit. When it's hot, you should be hot Buddha, and when it's cold, you should be cold Buddha. So if we want to change our lives, we can't change the circumstances of our lives, like moving the rheostat. But we can change how we understand our lives. We can find out, you know, who we really are,

[23:50]

and why we suffer, why we suffer. This was the question that brought the Buddha to his place under the tree. Who we really are isn't so easy to know. It's a very common question, you know, who are you? We're asked that question all the time. We fill out forms answering that question as best we can. And yet, every time I answer, I feel like I'm not telling the truth. That's not who I am. Somehow, not answering seems closer. So I found it to be a great relief in the Buddha's teaching that who I really am has very little to do with what I think, one way or the other. And thinking is only a very small part of reality. We are reality itself.

[24:55]

It doesn't get much better or worse than that. You are not it. It actually is you. And the other great question that people ask us all the time is, what's happening? You know, and commonly we'll say, oh, not much, or, same old, same old. Well, there's another. It's kind of a lie, you know, because everything's happening. All at once. The entire universe in a cup of bright green tea. We can't stand it. So we make it small. We try to make it small. But it's within everything that our true self can be found, within each sight and each sound, each smell, each feeling, each thought. It's very hard for us to say what it is,

[26:09]

but even a baby can do it. So I thought I would ask you also to consider your experience throughout the day. To notice how it is. How big it is. When did it start? Where will it end? Is it one thing? Is it many things? The four great oceans pour into your body through a single tiny opening. No one is injured and nothing is disturbed. The language of these teachings is the language of our true self. It's inconceivable. Unlimited. Suffering is caused by limitation.

[27:10]

By contraction. By getting a hold of a small idea and not letting it go. I'm old, I'm fat, I'm tired, I'm angry. This is our ancient habit. And it's much harder for us to break this habit than it is to quit smoking. Someone once asked one of the teachers here what they were going to get out of sitting here all day, day after day after day. And he said, it's not what you're going to get that really matters, it's what you're going to lose. So, I wanted to just tell you very quickly what it is you're going to lose. And that is, your upside down views.

[28:17]

And you only have four of them. And they all fit together very nicely. They're set. The first view is that there is a self. And the Buddha said, there is no such thing. And the second view is that there are things. Durable, long-lasting, acquirable things. And the Buddha said, there are no such things. Not the way you think of them. And the third view is that this self, chasing after these things, is pleasant. We believe that. And the Buddha said, it's just a cat chasing its own tail. Round and around and around. Ignorant desire and suffering. Ignorant desire and suffering. Around and around.

[29:19]

The word samsara means endless circling. So, the last of these beliefs, the fourth one, is the glue that holds the others together. And this one is the hardest one of all to break. This belief is that what I believe to be true is in fact true. This is where we come to our convictions. Our deeply held convictions. I am here. This is mine. And as soon as I get it all organized properly, I will be happy. We believe that's true. We believe it with our whole being. The reversal of this pattern is called wisdom, the teaching of emptiness. That there is nothing. Not the way we think of it.

[30:21]

There is no thing. No thing. Nothing there. It's an illusion. It's a wonderful illusion. But it's an illusion. So how these illusions are formed is precisely what the Buddha was watching on the night of his enlightenment. He was watching the pattern of illusion making. How we make illusions. How we make up the story. How we continuously create our version of reality and impute it on everything. It's like a kid with dirty fingerprints. We put our fingerprint on everything. Our opinion. Our view. Our preference. And it's not so much that these illusions are bad or not entertaining or useful, because they are useful and they are entertaining.

[31:23]

But I think what's important and more deeply satisfying to us is when we actually pull back the curtain and see how the Wizard of Oz is making a show. It's much more interesting. To study the Buddha way is to study the self and all of the stories that flow out from that place. So I want to finish by telling you about a very real wizard who stood at the crossroads of the town creating elephants and dragons out of sticks and pebbles. This is a true story. When people came to look, they saw elephants and dragons and they ran away. But the question is, what did the wizard see? Well, he saw elephants and dragons

[32:27]

but he knew they were sticks and pebbles. So if we continue our practice, please don't expect that the world will change the way it looks. But you can expect that how you think about the world will change and even vanish. Which brings me back to the very first question, which is, well, how? How do we do that? And it's very simple. We sit here for a long time in this room by the pond and we watch. On the inhalation the world arises and on the exhalation the world descends like a bright green turtle on the open ocean.

[33:31]

Wonderful, wonderful. But I allow no such pleasant feeling that arises in me to gain power over my mind. Thank you very much. May our intention... May our intention...

[33:56]

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