Tokubetsu Sesshin

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a man with enemies
as taste
we need
when it sad
the be with you he ain't said
i am but i found out that than i will be getting government question
what i've been allowed to talk about
what then has the weeks began during fall
and i had to experience where around the arrival of santa ana before the come from all over the world
but also the some of the here drink
as i watched the students here interacting
better than some completely hooked up around

thank you
it's like hey how's that
cause i got to watch the gringos sanga interacting with their teach you
endless listening here
ah most importantly is like that too
interact with
my own brahma brothers and sisters and my teacher
deciding will speak on the very different topic for
how's that

hello suggestions i can speak in the radical is hand

what was time

how's that

are you getting it okay
ah now you got it
so my experience of all of you have the
worldwide sanga in the sands the green gulch sanger are watching the interactions of people meeting my own karma brothers and sisters and my teacher and and thing there is that the past fifteen years
it's the first time i've spent this long period of time with my teacher and with my grandma brothers and sisters and i watched and began to just renew my appreciation of what this incredible dharma is all about and how it manifests how it unfolds
ah the kind of magic that takes place in just very quietly moment to moment day by day in these interactions and so i decided to talk a little bit about the transmission of light
not so much the technical aspects of it but ah more the personal aspects of it how it unfolds day to day
someone asked me earlier today what i was going to speak i in the being out students and i mentioned that i was going to have that transmission of the light
and she said all so you're not going to talk about anything that time would be of interest to us you know and i mean it's not as transmission of the light is not
ha something that happens at the end of training it's something that's a continue on it's just like the ceaseless practice and that we do eight a day out our moment to moment it includes every interaction that we have with our teachers
with each other
crown and
and it's the are wonderful thing about it about the transmission of realize is that really has nothing to do with something going from a to b
ah we use the word transmission and a kind of and a sense is a little bit misleading
a buddha when he realized himself ah first statement out of his mouth was that all sentient beings possess the tathagata his wisdom virtue each and every one of us ah
and at light is that buddha wisdom ah that's were born with
it's not something that comes from matters is more process of discovery of realization of the inherent perfection
that's the life of each one of us and it doesn't happen in any one point in time the formality of it may happen at a point in times suddenly one day your dharma brother or sisters walking around with a black case in the next day as a brown kisser
on but the process was an endless process and our practice is an endless practice ah each time we take the bodhi seat with verify an actual eyes the enlightenment of the boot
der of all what does past present and future
so what i'd like to look at is how
ha this process of the transmission of the right happens a different teachers have different criteria of how they do this but at some point they they there is a coming together that happens between the teacher and student where re kind of formalize what has taken place
ace ah logan says in each generation every face has been the face of the buddha and this original face is direct face-to-face transmission and that's what it's about one to one where an ancestral lineage you know or was handed down from
generation to generation is primarily the relationship between the teacher and student
their point of meeting or what is that what is what is it all about the great master yeah kojo once said that gift the students' understanding equals that of the teacher they diminish the dharma behalf when it's only when the student has surpassed the
teach the dharma transmission is complete
for what is that about
i've chosen on a small paragraph out of chicago gonzo our sons week the mountains and rivers sutra duncan
and in it he says since ancient times wise ones and sages have lived by the water when they lived by the water they catch fish or they catch humans so they catch the way these are all traditional water styles and going further they must be catching the self catching the hook being caught by
the hook and being caught by the way in ancient times when with you suddenly left the cuisine and went to live on the
river he caught the sage of the flower in river isn't this catching fish isn't it catching humans catching water is it not catching himself that someone could see talk with you is because he is toque
you talk with you teaching someone is is meeting himself
can i think that's the heart
of what goes on what takes place on the mountains and rivers sutra has been an important one for me personally ah any one of the fascicles of drugs angie is is so chock full of incredible
teaching and this one in particular
really touched me kind of karmacally goes while i was some
i'm studying get as a cla with my zoomy roshi
i had asked him if we could work on the sutra
doxa i wanted to know more about it and he said sure and get yourself a copy of it will start working on it the only copy that was in existence at that time was the thesis of called pedophile and it was in the school library either a man
this thesis or a doctoral thesis is translation
and so i got myself a copy of it i began studying it and then before we got a chance to do anything i was asked to come east with fatigue and sensei to help him set up so mountains and rivers sergio went on the back burner and then a while later as we found a place that to we were going to ist
turns out it was on on a mountain with two rivers crossing in front and seem so auspicious to me at the time relationship to the mountains and rivers sutra say a yen started reading it the day we moved in
i stopped at a coffee shop and bought a copy of the local paper that woodstock times and i opened it up page to big bold type read across the top it said these mountains and rivers of the present hardiman manifestation
one of the way of ancient put protests dog n thirteenth centuries and masses a small town newspaper and i started reading the article on it was all about duggan's mountains and rivers which i get very excited about it and other auspicious sign went to the local
newspaper as who did it and i said the editor and i burst into the editor's office and
so did you write this article on he said yes i said well jerry this is a very obscure texts it wasn't published an english anywhere where did you find out about dog and zingy
me straight in the eye and said doesn't everybody at perkins engine
so that became a kind of the spirit of aurora practice their and manchu tremper and it became kind of a personal column to me and still is it just as endless wisdom that keeps the more i study at the more comes up
makes itself clicker
so cosine in this coin could see tokyo you because he is tokaj you talk as you seeing someone is as meeting himself
my teacher seeing me as my teacher meeting himself and it's me meeting myself
that's what was going on for me this week here and that's what led me to this or this topic zhou is
yeah he was a student of
yeah cuisine and
the opposite as you know came from as quito and the author of the sand okay and it was a time in chinese buddhism that time
the air was kind of filled with a way in and the relationship between dualities between absolute and relative
yeah it was the seeds of sick kiddos sandow guy was the seed of or the five ranks of master tucson and yakuza had transmitted to own gun who transmitted the toes on and that was the beginning of the soto school and he had also transmitted to dogo
and don't go
as timer brother was stuck a jew and at one point talk with you left the assembly of the ako sa and went off calling himself good for nothing went off to live along the flower in river and became a boatman near where he fell
read people kind of appropriately for a people back and forth across the river because he was teaching also it was during a period of time of the great purge of buddhism and in china so a lot of these monks see them hid away or became pyramids or disguise themselves on
but my teacher seeing me is my teacher meeting himself and his me meeting myself isn't as the same as buddha meeting the buddha
for you often say to realize oneself as to really be intimate one with oneself well being intimate with one sound isn't this the buddha meeting put that
the meeting oneself
right now for one of the talks and it was a i was one of the talks that knows accurate roshi gave he talked about vertical and horizontal succession
ah i'm kind of part of the ceremony of transmission it has to do with establishing that merging that identity of a teacher and student ah in fact in this sutra here are dogan speak so the parent big
coming to child and child becoming the parent and there are certain things that had done and that ceremony that kind of reverse the role of teacher and student ah and this vertical succession horizontal succession there's a gestures that had done that kind of punctuate that
ah in russia in one of his talks and against someone else and another talk talked about to receive the guy is to transmit guy that transmitting and to transmit means to be awake but in the process of transmitting there's receiving in the process of receiving
this transmitting giving is receiving receiving is giving and we find it in all of the different aspects of our training would constantly as brought up as brought it comes up to me the biggest place it comes up as and and luigi and service
no ah we receive the teachings and when you receive the teachings and it's touching your life deeply you you get overwhelmed with the need to want to give something back and you feel so inadequate when it work could i possibly do what can i possibly give my teacher who gives me some i
oh that's what the service that's you know bridges and ancestors it's a way of giving back of giving our gratitude of identifying with them
mean near the memorial service for suzuki roshi today is a way of appreciating that endless teaching of his that still going on
duchess i've mentioned today was standing funeral ceremonies that you know at death
it's just a change in the form of teaching with continuous obviously on the buddhist teaching continues dolenz teaching continuous as if he wrote his teachings continue
endless teaching endless receiving an endless giving that's why it's so important to be able to do that and it's the same and a hot soup
the monk receives a donation he gives the heart sutra back to the person giver and receiver in that process merge become one
an oreo key when you receive the food we make an offering a fool we give back to the ten thousand things from where we received it
and so it's really critical and i was one of the things that are kind of hit me on the head on here that being with my teacher and and watching him interact with it a steady stream the people that come and on talk to you know ah and in this
subtle ways that the teaching is taking place it we sometimes miss we don't even realize that we're receiving a teaching
and if it's one sided if we just take and don't give back a kind of makes us a thief was so kind of you feel something's missing but when you're able to give back at kind of makes that dynamic relationship between the teacher and student to the street
and the dharma ah live sparking
i remember one of been an incident in my own training and probably russia doesn't even remember it it was one of those small moments fleeting
ah when i grew up by a grew up during the depression my father died when i was eight years old and my mother had to go out to work and it was a very difficult period of time and she wasn't able to make enough money just with a job so she began cleaning houses
as and
she had ended up cleaning houses for people which my father was in politics said the state level and she used to be host many dinner parties and so on and she ended up cleaning houses with some of the people that used to be her guests in i remember crying at night she wouldn't take welfare she had the that you earn
whenever you get you worked for it and down she
what do these house cleaning things and i grew up having this thing about servants and people cleaning your house now remember if it i got married and we had enough money to afford it my wife wanted a housekeeper i just resisted by crazy and finally she persisted and i agreed we ended
and i was just felt awful i couldn't i couldn't do it i couldn't have this woman serving us i couldn't have this woman cleaning my house and we argued finally we let her go and that stayed with me for many years and years later his we were established i'm and trying
april one year roshi she came to visit and were sitting in the avicii and i was cooking dinner for us and and i was trying to talk with him and make the din and he says once you get the anja to help you
so i proudly said i don't have an anja i do it myself
and he said right in so selfish that you won't let your students serve you
and i had never seen that and having seen that which seems like a i nothing simple thing
having seen at changed my whole way relating to my students are being able to receive from them what they had to give me and being able to give back to them
does the source of the inexhaustible our strength that comes in a relationship between a teacher and student i didn't never realized how much that nourished and how ah
when there's only giving and know receiving that the student will dry up or the teacher will dry up one of the other that they both need it
i remember reading recently and all memorial issue yes tiny memorial issue
of his death and in it someone describes the story of the last gk that does tiny roshi gave and they said that he was a very sick it was close to death actually had died a couple of days later after this gk ceremony and they didn't take up telling him you know don't don't you don't have to do this
and he knew that these students were waiting for your chi and insisted on doing a fact one of them it's akin roshi that received uk and android and akin i received your chi on that day so i dragged himself to this chick a ceremony i had to be helped to walk in
and they set him down in the seat was very feeble very very weak and as the ceremony began this person describing it said that he suddenly became a lion you know his voice was strong is chanting with strong it was totally present it was one of the most
powerful gk ceremonies they had ever seen and then it was over he kind of began to fade again but what fed him the juice that ran through his veins at that point was what came from his students and he sent it right back and that's to die
dynamic love the relationship face to face with a teacher is nothing that just goes to adp it doesn't go in one direction is present in both places it comes alive when they come together and the deeper and straw
longer that coming together as the clearer it begins to become
the whole story of this sam encounter than in the mountains and rivers suture there's just that one paragraph as to find out more about it you really need to go into the a bureaucrat and in there
there a master dogan speaks in detail about this particular thing and also look for this because it is kind of a coin among his three hundred coin shop again ginza but it's not not there but it isn't he a go cool and what he says
it is
that town
dogo had gone to a cosines monastery evidently cosine was the abbot of a monastery and
and listened to one of cosines talks and during the talk and the lecture hall a monk asked them what's the dharma kiah the sun replied it has no form
and the monk said
what is the dharma i
in cosine said it has no crack and on hearing this dogo who was visiting bursts out laughing and spite of themselves and after the talk hassan came down from the rostrum and ass or go go why he had laughed and logo said i have a dharma brother who teaches others and
a boat on the flower in river you should go and see him and you sure realize it he also suggested that the cosine change out of his temple close immediately go to the river and circa sunday daddy put on traveling clothes made the journey to the river and as soon as tokaj you saw him coming
he said chief monk of an assembly in what temple do you stay and cosine said i stay at know temple otherwise i wouldn't look like this
and tacos you said if you don't you say you don't but then what do you look like
and kosten said i am beyond sight hearing and consciousness and token you really when adam then went for his throat
where did you learn that he says beyond sight and hearing eh
and took what you said even one phrase of ultimate reality would lose its freedom forever if we were too attached to it to drop a thousand foot fishing line means the seeker fish with golden scales and fish with golden scales with stuff
another way for enlightenment to realize
why don't you say a word he says to him
and as cosine was about to open his mouth to respond toku to leapt on him and threw him into the water and held his head under
ah and then took would you lifted him up gulping and gasping demanded say a word say a word and again just says cosine started opened his mouth to say something back again into the water and hold them there by the second or third time cause real realized
himself and now suddenly and when he came up he bowed to his teacher and talk you said
you're welcome to the fishing line but the meaning of its ripples know quiet water is naturally profound and croissants had why do you want to give away the fishing line and the fishing line in this case is a symbol for teaching being a teacher
toku choose handing it over justice sometimes the the cuts of ship of the staff fly whisk i use the symbols and handed over at the time of transmission from a teacher and to a student
i'm here the teacher was a boatman fishermen and so
a fishing pole and hook and fishing line become the symbol so what's passed on from the teacher to the student
so why do you want to give away the fishing line in the hook cosine asked and took bridges as it was to fasten a green float to a fishing line design whether a fish of golden as golden scales and or not that is to find out if someone had realized it or
and then he said if you have realized that say it quickly tell me quickly words a wondrous and unspeakable you can see such a fish only after you fished it out of the sea wave and only after you've gone beyond discrimination and while he's talking cosine sticks his fingers in his ears and begins to walk away
and tacos uses quite so quite so
and so the dharma was transmitted from
talk with you to cosign
and then tacos you said to him staying on mount yakuza cuisine for thirty years i clarified this and now that you grasp that you must not live and the castle city or human habitation your traces nor should you hide yourself will you leave no trace
in moscow to amount in recess lead one person or a half a person to succeed in the dharma so that it's not extinguished realize that temperatures meaning cosine made about thankful bow and started to depart as he was walking away
tacos you called out abbott and when cosign look back
war and said try to tell me i have something more and at that point he jumped out of his boat and disappeared into the water
and later cosine became a very popular teaching and hogan in the a roku what i just read while came from the a borrow kubota rewarded at that wording is little awkward in translation
what the dog and says is although and cosine was at the other temple he was excellent in discussion he expounded a teaching see humans and celestials it was perfect in speech and no one can defeat him in an argument it still wasn't complete
since he has seen tokens you he had realized himself so there was nothing more to be desired he succeeded in the essence of the buddha and became the master you may seek such a person in the world now we find it impossible ah what a shame
noble buddhist trainees you must know this first of all you must have an indestructible body seeking mind and fix your eyes upon the absolute round beyond increase and decrease
see how talk would you left a fishing hook who could do such a deed
that a point where he calls and says abbott and the abbot turns around and he jumps out and the boat disappears
kind of his i love for really happened he really did that but it's kind of bruh
similar to a thing that happens in the transmission ceremony guam zhuhai were after the ceremony is over and you're doing all this stuff with your teacher and incredible bonding is taking place that's bringing the years of training and practice with the teacher to its conclusion
and switching positions so on and then suddenly the ceremony is over the teacher's gone and you come back later to the empty room and you bow your bows and the direction of the teacher and actually only
found out i was here talking the roshe i thought i was the the direction i was told about in there was the empty chair that roshi was sitting are well as ceremony was taking place and we would exchange seats and so when i was bowing i was bowing when i was seeing was this empty chairs and
the bowing in the direction of where his bedroom was he was asleep ah but what a feeling that was you know that the empty seat being there were a feeling it must have been here were suddenly teacher disappears and way you are but because the teacher really
the ever disappear
needless to say no doesn't happen i mean if it's if if the thing is complete
i teachers always present and the teaching are always present or sense we say no don't let the dog would be disdained extinguish how how could you let it be extinguished where would it go you know what protect the dharma what
but what is it as realized
vulture peak or the buddha holds up a flower blink his eyes and the dharma ghost america chapeau rock i shop or calls out to nanda and on the answers and their of those onto the next generation pebble hits bamboo and it's too
transmitted took but you almost drowns san and it's transmitted
but it's not only these accounts that we read about the various coins it's a continuum it's a continuum that begins from the moment we take the seat when the moment we meet our teacher maybe even before we even meet or teacher and know that was a case for me
bit think the the the fact that that was going to happen had filled me i had no idea what it was all about plenty gonna happen
and you know it made no sense that was no logic to it my intellect couldn't do damn thing with it but my heart knew that something was taking place santa i had needless to say resisted every step of the way you know it was like struggling
in ah
against this incredible force and that force is the light that's transmitted but the light is already part of it were born with it it doesn't come from the outside
and all the teacher is doing
well as the same light as did the buddha is helping us uncover that helping us and work our way through the layers of conditioning
and all of us the condition where condition from bonus there's no way to avoid it with conditioned by our parents were teachers by our environment by our culture by our peers by our education by our religion it's like a continual process of programming so that by the time we reach adult
third we don't know who we are or what our life is are confused and we're trying to live our lives out of some sort of stuff that would rent all and what the buddha dharma is saying is that we really need to go very deep into ourselves to find a foundation of our like something that going
find in a book and so you have to deal with that conditioning layer by layer because beneath all of that it was a person alive a buddha alive and well buried under those layers of condition and to get to that ground of
being and realize it and then not only realize it but actualized learned to live our life out of what we've realized
or into actualized to manifest because until it's happening there it's not yet over zen training is not over
so it's not enough to ascend the mountain get to the peak of amount when we still have to come back down off the mountain back into the world until that which has been realized has been actualized in everything we do and where we drive a car raise a child grow garden make wow or whatever else we do
until this manifesting in our day to day reality it's not complete
it's not just about the one side is about the both sides coming together
why leave time for some questions

when you look at our history
we read the newspapers
seems that the basic characteristics of our species are war and pillage and hate and insensitivity
we destroy the environment in each other
he we are at the edge of the twenty-first century
when you look at what we bring to it i mean when you know we we know so much
about the universe so much more than these ancient teachers knew about it and mean a monk that comes into training
today is so sophisticated and ways of the world and knowledge and so on
we know about subatomic species and worlds and other planets in computers and artificial intelligence in bioengineering and all of this incredible six star but what do we know about ourselves or
was nothing
our history has continually been dualistic and everything we call our knowledge is dualistic
self and other this and that are psychology or philosophy or politics or sociology medicine all of it is based on a dualistic way of seeing the universe and it's no wonder that we end up killing each other and fighting each other ripping each other
but there has been in history and very little
was known by the general public
small handful of humans who for two thousand five hundred years
police men of women have been constantly verifying in actualizing the truth a group of nature
realizing that ground of being in manifesting it in their lives
realizing and actualizing the inherent
buddha nature that's the birthright of each one of us is the thing that lights the fire that raises the body mind that brings us into practice to begin with there isn't one of us sitting in here right now it wouldn't be here that fire that spiritual fire were burning in us
it raises the questions
who am i what is truth what is reality what is life what his death
when that becomes the cutting edge of
her practice
it enables us to endure the unendurable an unendurable to engaged and one of the most difficult encounters than any of us will ever experience and that is to encounter the sell the study the cell sounds so easy you know study the buddha
ways to study the south study the self as to forget the so
until we get this helpers to be enlightened by the ten thousand but to study the south
is a big thing most of us spend our life avoiding herself we make ourselves none so that we don't have to deal with it
and to forget the cell from itself as specifically programmed not to be forgotten
that's where the resistance comes in
and what is it has uncovered after we get through all of these layers
what is that true but we're we're surrounded by it
we're interpenetrated by it we coexist with it so much so that they can be spoken of we can't even point to it
a finger pointing to the moon is the moon the moon is the finger
my finger sees the morning moon sees the finger moon realize the smoothness and the finger realizes fingernails and they realize each other
there's no way to separate them
that's what that
teacher student relationship is and that's what so far as i'm concerned with dharma transmissions
total identifying total merging but it's not even that seems like a something that you do it's realizing that connectedness it's always been there
but not just with a teacher is just the beginning
with a whole catastrophe
oh good and all the evil
master dogan says the interdependence between the buddha and each one of us cannot be measured we should sit quietly and reflect on this
through shaq him on his face we will reflect his eye in our own when this occurs it becomes the buddhist vision an original face
this transmission has been handed down right up to the present time and has never been broken
this is the meaning of the direct face-to-face transmission in each generation
in each generation every face has been the face of the buddha and this original face is direct face to face transmission open the i directly transmit through the eye and received the garments for the i
find the direct transmission of the face through the face direct transmission is giving and receiving of the face open the mind transmit and receive through the mind reveal the body and transmit the body through the body regardless of the place or the country
transmission has always been just like this
he wrote a poem one evening and his mountain retreat in a hinchey that may had a retreat house and he used to go to use to right
the palm he says evenings as an hours advance
sleep hasn't come yet
more and more i realize mountains and rivers are good for the efforts of the way
sounds of the river valley and to my ears for light of the moon fills my eyes outside of this
he's not a single thing
what an incredible teacher
how can we ever
repay him
for these teachings how can we ever repay
that's why the buddha after he realized himself didn't go off somewhere in solitude and live out his life and peace and quiet he kept himself in the very
samsara then he was looking to get out of for forty seven years so that this time i could reach us here so that we could be practicing it today
and every teacher that followed a buddha down through india and china and japan to the present time we had the same motivation it was
i take it very personally was for me
he did it
and how to wire a pain i will pay my own teacher
or is only one way to do it and that is to realize ourselves
and to pass it onto the next generation and other words to do what they have done
i give life
give our life to this incredible dharma
and give life
to the buddha
that's all i've gathered so on
two questions if you have any

struggling through on
struggling through
i said struggling through the light
i don't remember saying it and i don't understand it either than anybody else hear them
this is silence mean no one ever heard it he said
oh ah ok now i understand
at that's more personal thing i don't know how many people experience that sort of thing but
i that's one of my highlights of my life by resist
when i got this call recently i told someone that wasn't resistance they gave me the coal was conforming they gave me the cold resistance makes my life vibrant and when i first realized the credible pool i was
i grew up very resistant to religion and i was a catholic and i had to go to catholic school jesuits for my teachers nuns with my teachers and although i had this great respect for them and what they did i had so many questions about the religion and never got answers
they would treat me like a heretic of some kind so by the time i was eleven i was an atheist and very active atheist all by live and so in buddhism started coming into my life i found myself resisting it and on particularly when i go to
a center and i see people with robes you know and bowing and all the stuff i mean it would just repelled me now and i remember i go to a session i i remember not wanting to go to the session to begin with i went to the monastery just a photograph because the teach your head very lousy photo
graphs that he was showing at a slide show and i said okay he needs a photographer him so i'll go and make pictures for him and i went make pictures and in the head monk said would like to sit with us and i was sitting on my own or for four years i was saying before i would go near a teacher and i said sure and i came and sat and act
for a while the teacher's who wanted to come into session is over not ready for session isn't are you ready as why my can't actually i don't have the time and he says you always come in on the saturday anyway just come from one day and as why i don't have the money's not pay for you
and you know that i finished the session i'm driving back down the mountain i'm saying never gonna come here again i'm never gonna do this again two days later i'd be going back you know and then one day he came two days it became three days and every time i'd finished the session i'd swear i'd never do as
session again and rest of my life that's the resistance and talking about i mean it went on and on and on and on it it's still not over i still practice it
i used to resist liberty you know and i mean i would sneak out the side door as soon as liturgy started i mean a everything else is fine work and desires and and on the liturgy i would disappear the side door and every time i would take off remember touching him
going to go after me roshi was a go and then after a while they pulled me into a position where i had to be there for the luigi and i did that position and i hated everybody in the sanctimonious looks on their faces and all this and and then little by little adjusts
opened up no idea how it happened or why it happened you know i mean it's just like i had nothing to do with it and i remember years later going back and giving a talk at the same center at ucla rocio yes we give a talk and i decided to give a talk on
liturgy because they're doing a sloppy they weren't paying attention to it on i gave this fire and brimstone thing about liturgy and i went on and on and on and when the talk was over were walking back to the house
the elbows me and said he remembered his sneak out the side or
so it changes but that's the resistance i was talking about
gonna take everybody has it but i know a lot of people to have it
anyone else
was it that clear what was it obscure that there are no questions

yeah i think anybody starts to and this practice thinking that that's what they want to do know i did
so who knows in our the buddha's that sit in this hall with great teachers that sit in this hall
i assure them
so everybody really should practice that way
some incredible journey it's been an incredible journey for me and who would have guessed it
definitely not me

so that's it